Ignite Your fire
Author: Jama Maxie
Jama’s story is part of our youth Back-to-School Storytelling Campaign!
Unsinkable Youth is supported by Sun Life. #YouthMentalHealth
TW: This Unsinkable story discusses addiction, domestic violence, anxiety, and trauma. We invite our community to read it only if it's the right time for them. If you're struggling, please reach out to the Crisis Text Line or Kids Help Phone.
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My name is Jama Maxie, and I’m a psychology major at York University and a mental health advocate. To be chosen as one of the panel speakers for this year’s Unsinkable event means a lot to me and to my community.
To me, to be unsinkable means to be resilient in the face of adversity. It's unavoidable that challenges will occur in our life, but I believe it’s how we deal with them that determines our level of happiness. To be unsinkable we must prepare for the flood that is sure to come at some point in our lives. When the waves crash against the levee you’ve built, you can have rigorous honesty with yourself and the people around you. To be unsinkable is also to be transparent with your feelings, even though doing so is hard at times. If we’re not, our floodgates might crack.
Even before post-secondary education, I faced challenges that shaped my life.
I grew up in the foster system and was separated from my siblings at a young age. Education was something I always struggled with and wasn’t an area of expertise. I never thought that school was the right fit for me—no one in my family had ever been in postsecondary school, and even in my wildest dreams, I never thought it would be a possibility for myself.
After years of struggling mightily with my mental health—and letting addiction take control of my life—I decided to become unsinkable. I was honest about my mental health for the first time in my life, and reached out for help. As I started therapy and services for my addiction, I realized that this time felt different than times in the past. This time, I shared the truth about my struggles and stopped caring about what people thought of me. I enrolled in post-secondary education at York University, despite my personal doubts, and instantly found great meaning in education. I started weekly therapy in my first year, which helped me tremendously with my anxiety and depression. But the summer after my first year, I had an experience that changed my life.
I was in a rough neighbourhood, hanging out with my mom and brother. I was in the wrong place at the wrong time, and was hit in a shooting.
After the shooting, I began to experience anxiety and fear that interfered with my ability to function daily. I wasn’t even able to walk around the block without having anxiety about getting shot again. I needed to strengthen the floodgates. I was honest about my struggles with my loved ones and reached out for psychological help that got me back on track. Even though I was doing better than ever, life still had surprise storms for me.
The following year, during school, I would find out that my father—who I’d never had a relationship with—was murdered in downtown Toronto. This was devastating news for me. However, even as these challenges flooded in, one of the major things that has brought me happiness throughout post-secondary education is working as an addiction counsellor, giving back to those who were in the shoes I once wore. Seeing people who were gripped by addiction like I was getting sober and having a life worth living was so fulfilling. Now, when tragedies happen in my life, I know I can’t give up—I have to be strong for others. There is no going back to the old me. My best advice for people who are struggling is that it's okay to not be okay. Many people hide their feelings and their struggles, living the façade that everything is okay. Doing thisis like putting a band-aid on a deep wound. Do the work on yourself and attack things directly—practice taking accountability. Be honest with yourself now, and your future self will thank you.
Thank you, little Jama.
Today, I am a motivational speaker and have a promising future as a clinical psychology graduate student who will one day earn his Ph.D. Every day I live my life never taking academia for granted, knowing that it could all be gone in an instant. One of the lessons I’ve learned, which I want to stress to all young students, is the importance of taking care of your mental health over the summer break—it’s not optional, it’s mandatory to be a healthy, functioning student.
Throughout my first couple of years in academia, I completely burnt myself out by not giving my mind enough time to rest during the summer. I was too obsessed with either work or summer school, ended up regretting it, and came back to school in September irritated.
Now, I look at my mind as I would an electric car: the car eventually needs to recharge—no one's brain has the kind of stamina to run forever. I now use my summers to “recharge” so that when September comes, I bring my best self to the desk. I continue to share my story knowing that others can draw strength and hope from it. The main message I want to stress for this year's Unsinkable event is a simple but forgotten one; you are not alone.
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Connect with Jama @igniteyourfire_416 on Instagram!
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